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Orgasmic energy and breath

hotspring's picture
Submitted by hotspring on

I haven't masturbated much since I last posted. I sucessfully abstained from orgasm once and felt no loss at all from it. Another time I did have an orgasm but it was of a very different sort. I noticed that when I was breathe in, the anterior wall of my vagina, where the g-spot is, expands, and when I breathe out, it contracts. This is without any intentional muscle movement. I'm learning how linked deep breathing is to high states of ecstatic bliss.

When I was younger I practically held my breath when I masturbated, and noticed then that I didn't feel much ecstatic energy when I breathed deeply. Probably I was more focused then on the clitoral and up and inward pulling sensations alone and didn't know how to balance them with the outward pouring ones (and by this I don't necessarily mean ejaculation, tho that is the extreme version of it. still, there is a gentle releasing and vulnerability when the uterus is pushed down and the muscles are expanded rather than contracted, that is very open and lovely, and which is a balance to the upward pulling).

To abstain or not to abstain from Female Ejaculation

hotspring's picture
Submitted by hotspring on

I recently began ejaculating during masturbation, and notice it as being very distinct from conventional orgasm and not necessarily simultaneous with it. I am less inclined to stop ejactulating since this is something that I have only recently experienced and want to explore more. Certainly it is very luscious and very ecstatic, in a rushing, generous, free-flowing way, with a quality very distinct from orgasm that is not as aggressive or sharp.

I have heard differing opinions as to whether female ejaculation is draining or not. The fact is, very little is known or shared about this capacity in women. In his book "Healing Love Through the Tao: Cultivating Female Sexual Energy", Mantak Chia says only: "Now that women's ejaculation is known to occur, there will probably be much relief, relaxation, and increased pleasure among women who have this capacity." He does not seem to equate it with the "outward pouring orgasm" that he says should be held inside and transformed into "beyond orgasm." This is interesting, since ejaculate is certainly more of a literal "outpouring" than conventional orgasm.

Meditative Self-Loving

hotspring's picture
Submitted by hotspring on


I am a 28 year old single female studying massage therapy but currently supporting myself through environmental advocacy work in the nonprofit sector.

I am starting this blog as a way to document and hopefully support a deeper journey into my sexuality and vitality as a person. Since I have already shared my experiment in another post (which led to the invitation to blog here), I copy parts of that post as my introduction:

I am not presently with a partner, but I have been attempting - with varying degrees of success - to use meditative masturbation and a buildup of orgasmic energy to direct my conscious awareness and ecstatic self to different parts of my body in an attempt to see if I can rejuvenate or heal unhealthy patterns. I am using principles gleaned from Tantric and Taoist traditions, and from my own study of massage therapy and energy work - particularly the work of Donna Eagan, who wrote "Energy Medicine." In this book, she points out that many illnesses stem from a break in the fabric of a person's "grid". A break is an energy leak. Taoist and Tantric traditions also point out that weak muscles and shallow breathing cause energy leaks. I also consider a leak to be anything that I do compulsively that drains me of energy due to excessive focus on that thing.


sood's picture
Submitted by sood on

Something came up last night as we were making love. We were managing fine, staying well within the 30%-70% Zone of Excitement, when I ran into the usual wall of voices.

"More friction needed ..."
"This is so good ... let's make it better."
"Let's go all the way ... we can start afresh tomorrow."

I was able to laugh these voices off, and stayed, I like to think, reasonably in control, when another voice piped up:

"So, if we aren't going to climax, how are we going to end?"

Nobody else was in the house so there were no noise prohibitions. We weren't under any time constraints. We weren't yet tired. My wife was flushed and excited, as was I.


sood's picture
Submitted by sood on

I've been wondering recently how much my sex life determines my mood. I've noticed over the years that an event or thought that might sometimes cause a major reaction in me, resulting in a flare up or brown study, can on other occasions cause as little disturbance as water on a duck's back. I've always assumed that something in my personality determined this, and that it was largely outside my control; or, at least, the internal reaction of rage or disappointment was outside my control, whereas, of course, the choice of whether or not I 'give in' to the emotion was mine alone.

I'm now wondering if something as seemingly innocuous as regular orgasms could be the cause of this. In other words, if orgasm makes the status quo seem like something I need to get away from – to spread my genes by impregnating someone other than my wife – then making the present seem less than fantastic would be the best way of going about it.


sood's picture
Submitted by sood on


It's been an instructive few days, making it clear that change of this sort is not easy.

On the occasions we've made love recently, although we've started out with the best of intentions, I've managed to either overreact defensively, bringing the session to a premature end, or to change gear midway through and steer things to a not so triumphant conclusion.

Any fault is largely mine, rather than my wife's, because she is far more open to 'whatever happens', whereas I like to make what I think is 'the right' thing happen.

Specifically, I found that if we didn't 'do' enough for me to remain sexually aroused in the only way I recognise (i.e., maintaining an erection), I lost interest, to the point of not wanting to continue. A couple of times, we just rolled over and went to sleep.


sood's picture
Submitted by sood on

My wife and I have been married for more than thirty years. We've both in our early fifties. We've always enjoyed our sex life, but recently, it's got a little twitchy, with me wanting one thing and my wife another, and an increasing difference in the frequency of our desire for lovemaking.

We've tried a lot of different approaches to get things back on an even keel. One of the best is the Coital Alignment Technique (similar to 'grinding the corn'), which is great for producing a gentle build up of sexual friction and an explosive, whole body, usually simultaneous orgasm. The trouble is, it's hard to keep from speeding up and getting over frantic towards the end.

The First Five Days

Submitted by acb5042 on

I am 16 years old, almost-upper middle class male, atheist.

I think knowing a little about myself might help you to get a clearer picture of where I am and where I want to go. I was first introduced to the world of exuality by complete accident, when I was hanging out with my friends, when I was in fifth-grade. An older guy in the group told us what sex was. Back then my personality was quite in accordance with moderate religiousity, and I remember telling myself once that I would never get into this filthy world, and even wondered why the heck people are even excited or attracted to something like that. But as I discovered more about this (through the Internet) -- I went to all kinds of sites: erotic stories, erotic videos, anything and everything that offered me a glimpse. Probably due to my nature of being a Scorpio, I was attracted to this, although I never experienced orgasm before making out with a girl after only a day that I had met her (she was in my class). It became very exciting, because of the pleasure, sure, but also because of the guilt (ref. Instruction Manual for the Primitive Brain). After I "broke up" with that girl (in a relationship that lasted for about a month, when I was in 8th grade), I've been addicted to masturbation, after I tried to stimulate that "aggressive movement down there".

Query - Rosarium Philosophorum

Marnia's picture
Submitted by Marnia on

Consider this series of drawings from an old alchemy text. They are one of several such series.
rosarium philosophorum

You may also view them here, where you can click on each image to enlarge it a bit.

These images seem to record a mystery that is often also referred to as the sacred marriage, "hierosgamos" or "conjunction of opposites." Are they strictly symbolic of some non-physical union, or do they point to the need for actual union of the sexes as part of a spiritual ritual? Can you learn anything about this mystery?

Me and me...

Submitted by Ryan on

There are moments in our lives that offer such clarity that their truth is undeniable. It is the Ah Ha moments where the puzzle pieces in our mind fit together and things just make sense. It's an understanding that is so deeply rooted that it never escapes us - verses memory which always seems to be hanging on by a thread.

I believe I experienced one of those moments just recently. In fact, it wasn't so much a single moment - but more a series of moments which very much included my dark depression with porn addiction. The realization that I had was simple, yet had, has, and will have many implications on how I see and live my life. To get there I had to go through a personal hell — a hell I have been living for a very very long time and only now starting to awaken from.