The last few months have been intriguing (and challenging) for me. I head butted with the local car insurance corporation around a small claim and saw that their interest in cooperation and mutual support is zero. I also struggled with a friend who seemed to share the same head centred/patriarchal/power over others attitude.
This has been changing recently. I saw some police do a sting not far from my house and felt more compassion for the fellow being arrested than joy at the quality of the arrest (The police did a great job of boxing his car in carefully before arresting him). My attitude bothered me and I decided that I had to clean up my beef with the patriarchal insurance agency and the friend.
I think this has strong connections in my mind to why relations between men and women generally go so poorly. It also has strong connections to my youth in the military. When men have no concept of what Love is and no ability to feel at all, intimate relations tend not to go so well. Kids, as a result, don't do well either.
I've managed to get my head out of the pit of anger it tended to fall into as I prepare to drag the insurance company into small claims court. My new affirmation for what I'm doing is:
"I actively contribute to a culture characterized by:
-personal responsibility for the well-being of the whole.
-cooperative and mutually supportive approaches to problem solving
-positive solutions to problems for the whole."
Our little "Men for Love" group here is taking on renewed life after a low period for a few months.
I've decided that I'm going to send some money (With the help of "Men for Love") to Femen (see my blog on women and anger. Hopefully I'll find a way to get a card and a 2013 "Herstory" agenda (see http://www.herstorycalendar.ca/) to them too. I want to help them transform their very justified anger. It might help me transform my pain.