I'm coming up on 6 weeks of no PMO, and I thought I would take a moment to do a little inventory of how things are going.
Quitting PMO has been fantastic for me. I still orgasm a few times a week during sex with my girlfriend, and right now I don't have any plans to change that. I sent her an article from this site about Karezza and she seems interested, and it's something we might try in the future. But we both really enjoy orgasming together. So for now, we will continue to do that.
The first few weeks of my no PMO I still masturbated, although less so. I'm almost at 3 weeks of no MO and am feeling good about continuing with that.
My girlfriend and I both like the fact that all of my sexual expression and experience is now with her. It's wonderful to share that with someone. It has made our sex deeper, closer, more pleasurable. My desire for her, especially when I go a week or so without any orgasm whatsoever, is intense. I'm very responsive and the pleasure I experience with her is out of this world.
I've noticed some other benefits, many of which have been chronicled on this site by others:
- Improved mood. I'm more calm and patient, handle stress much better, am generally more optimistic and friendly.
- More energy. I don't feel run down as much as I used to.
- Better sleep. My sleep fluctuates, but right now I'm sleeping well.
- I notice and appreciate women more. Just walking down the street I will see someone who really catches my attention.
- I just have a general better feeling of well-being. I don't drop into mild depression like I used to.
- This has been slower to come, but I am starting to feel like I am getting my "mojo" back, feeling more aggressive and confident and getting some of my "swagger" back. I'm hoping for more improvement in this area.
I think this all contributed to a significant reduction in my HOCD symptoms. Before I started this I would say, on a scale of 1-10 on how much HOCD bothered me and how much time I spent ruminating on it, I would say 7. Now, I would say 3. I still get the thoughts and spikes from time to time, but I'm able to brush them off much easier and move on with whatever I am doing. My brain doesn't become "locked" on this particular anxiety or doubt or worry as much as it used to. The intrusive thoughts during intimate times are less.
Thanks for everyone's support, this site has been a great find for me. I purchased Marina's book, which I plan to read on my next trip out of town.