What are people saying when they rip each other's clothes off and go at it like rabbits? In my view, the message is, "Gimme, gimme"
On the other hand, lying in a still embrace is like saying, "There's nowhere else I'd rather be. Heaven is in this moment."
What is your touch saying when you are trying to "make something happen"?
What are you saying with your touch when you are simply feeling the sensation and connection that is present in touching?