I can feel that in a few days I'm going to break out of this depressing fog I've had floating around my head. I'm making a ton of progress in terms of ascertaining my knowledge that porn destroys lives, and it feels good not having to hide away and pathetically get off to pixels on a monitor. It also feels good to know that I won't experience the same ball ache as I did when I cut out masturbation and orgasm entirely for weeks. I just need to keep breathing and fighting through the negative emotions as they arise, and meticulously cultivate my inner fire. Though I've done exercises of this nature before through yoga and writing out wish list, I really must figure out exactly what kind of woman I want to make my next girlfriend. Overall, I'm amazed at how undesirable porn has become to me anymore, and the gratification I get from this feeling and commitment is enough to get me through most days with a smile on my face. It's not a slippery slope after I masturbate to orgasm anymore, and I am not always reaching for my penis. I just take care of the build up and move on to the next activity. Hopefully soon, I will have a partner with whom I will do the same.