Feeling like a mess - Day 11

Submitted by JDxD on
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Just generally feel pretty shit. I feel up tight. Feel a loss of hope in my life, and I feel a lot of shame that I'm even alive. I don't know what to do.. I'm working all the time, and although my co-workers are nice to talk to and the customers fun to help out, I generally can't see many of my good friends. I'm just... lonely. I've been working out and doing yoga but it doesn't seem to be doing a whole lot lately. I felt such a strong urge to call my ex, or even go to her house. But that's the loneliness talking, and I honestly don't want to go there.

Hmm, I hope this passes soon. I don't even know if this part of the reboot. I guess I have no libido and that is part of it, and it makes me feel lifeless and my brain feels like it's hurting. That does seem quite consistent with the rebooting accounts I've read. But it feels like something so much deeper, like I'm completely lost. I feel under enormous pressure.