2 days in a row relapsing

Submitted by needhops on
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Ugh, I escort viewed, again, not for that long, but still, long enough. I'm in a bit of a rut right now. I had a great day, but had a lapse in decision making. Gotta just try again.

Comments

Needhops,

You need to be on a different forum. You need other men to tell you how to stop. Men who have been through this. Frankly, I think Mcbarera does too. This forum is not really a porn-recovery forum. It used to be and I don't mind supporting you guys as long as you're making progress.

But, having done this for years, I know the signs that something more is needed. Both of you have been circling around and rationalizing protracted recoveries that are really not doing you all that much good. Get your male peers to tell you what you need to hear without mincing words.

And then come back and tell me that you succeeded! I-m so happy

____

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A Sincere Question

I read your posts over the last couple months and you stated several times that you use escorts and that you like to cruise the escort websites. I would really like to know why you would go to an escort for sex. Is there like some power thing because you paid for her or because she is “bad girl” and therefore more exciting.

Dude I am not moralizing or anything but the national ratio of females to males in college is 57 to 43, that is for US and Canada. That is a 14 point spread; I would take those points on any football game. You are in college and I also understand that you are a little shy around women, but most college women can be pretty sexually aggressive. Unless you look like Quasimodo, smell like a wet dog, and act like a total creeper you can probably find a girl at my university that will be happy to jump your bones.

I would really like to understand your feelings on why you use a pro, I think other people probably would too but they most likely have better manners than to ask.

I definitely can be shy and

I definitely can be shy and had some bad approach anxiety, but i'm getting over it. I guess escorts are similar to porn in that it's me running from my problem. It's instant gratification without doing the work and risking rejection. I also have found that a lot of times, I connect better with slightly older women, i've found that I get along well with women ages 25-30, but then again, i'm sure I can find women who are college aged who I could hook up with. It's just a matter of learning to do something i've never really done before, and there's some growing pains that go along with it.