No Drama is Boring

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Submitted by Zia on
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At least to write about, but I will. The thing is I've been tracking my moods, hormone cycle, diet, etc. for several weeks now and my moods have become more and more consistently positive everyday (except the 2 days before my menstrual cycle - but even then, it was so clear to me from the moment I felt negative feelings that it must be PMS and so it was a lot easier to suffer through - I did my best not to delve into all my negative thoughts because I knew exactly where they were coming from).

My moods have been so settled that I even thought today "maybe I should orgasm and track what happens", but then thought "egads, I don't want that drama, I feel great right now!". On the outside, I don't really have any reason to feel this good - money is stressful and almost non-existent, I'm single and yet in love with someone who has no time (literally no time) to spend with me, I've gone on a couple of dates with interesting people, but I'm not really interested in a relationship with them, I'm single parenting which is just always challenging....But I don't feel badly or even stressed about any of this right now. On the contrary, I feel really optimistic about it all.

I've even been processing some older relationship stuff with a friend, which brings up some tears, but it's quite easy to get in touch with the source of them, let them go and go back to feeling good. I really think it is cause my neurochemicals have calmed right down and settled into a balanced state or something. I like this.

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how very nice

and anything *but* boring.

Reminds me of what I would have thought of Karezza a few months back. Sounds boooooooooring. But of course, it has been the most exciting thing in my entire life and remains so. Sometimes stillness is most exciting.

Yeah, this is a great state

Yeah, this is a great state to be in. I feel like I've been an explorer for years trying to find the end of the earth and wondering why I keep coming back to the same place each time...only to discover the earth is actually round. Aha! I'm not crazy, what a relief to figure that out!