I am 14 days into my first attempt to rid my life of porn consumption. I am happily married to a wonderfully supportive woman (I'm 32, she's 28 - married nearly 2 years).
These recent weeks have been very enlightening for both of us, we've talked a lot about how we can work together to bring me out of my addiction and how she can help with urges. We've had sex (like... regular sex) a number of times in this period, as well. Love has really been in the air with Valentine's Day occurring recently and the increased intimacy involved with baring my soul about PMO addiction.
We both came across karezza separately while reading about NoFap, porn (PMO) addiction, and dopamine abuse. She mentioned it a few times as we've discussed our plan for the upcoming week. (Should we have sex? How often? Do I need to avoid orgasm during a NoFap reboot?) Anyway, suffice to say that we would like to give it a try. We love each other a lot, and we love to have sex with one another. If there is another level to this whole thing, let's experience it.
I haven't picked up the book yet, but I intend to. The introductory articles on http://reuniting.info/ indicate that we should start he Ecstatic Exchanges by going to bed together each night. The trouble is, that's not something we do very often today. She starts work an hour or so earlier than I do each day, and I arrive home 2-3 hours later than she does. We get our daughter to bed around 8, have 1 or 2 hours of alone time together. She's asleep by 10 (usually by 9, actually), and I'm up until midnight or 1am. I don't need as much sleep as she does, and I'm not a morning person. I often use the late hours to do school work (I'm still taking college courses), or manage our finances, or just decompress.
Anyway... this was a long-winded way to ask if we can follow the Ecstatic Exchanges without sharing a bedtime? Would it be bad for the experience if I were to leave bed and do homework after? It sounds terribly un-romantic of me, but there are very few hours in the day and so very much to do.
**TL;DR: I want to succeed at breaking my porn addiction, and I want to enhance the intimate relationship I have with my wife. We want to try karezza, but we don't share a bedtime. Can we make it work another way?**