Does looking at pics delay recovery?

Submitted by jersey1 on
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I've seen a few pics non-nude but in dress approiate but I got a flashback of a porn clip but why?

don't look at them

it's the internal pictures in your head that you want to fade away. Those fade away when you don't pay attention to them or to external triggers. So pay attention to real girls and real social situations and AVOID on line pictures or any other type of fantasy and stimulus as best you can.

This is the addict in you

This is the addict in you talking. It's natural to want to look at pix but your porneffected brain will make it into a porn scenerio. Just cut out everything. The addict in all of us want to take shortcuts, but it's gonna slow or completely hinder your recovery.

Thats the tricky thing about

Thats the tricky thing about this addiction that totally blows crack or heroin out of the f#$%ing water. Your drug is in your head - the memories, images, flashbacks etc. Though nothing short of a lobatomy will ever make it possible to fully forget your porn experiences, those memories will eventually fade into relative oblivion if you follow the right path. Pictures of hotties are triggers for you, as they are for most porn addicts. I personally don't know if I ever would have recovered if I didn't stop looking at pictures of hot women (not talking about porn, just regular mags, billboards, posters etc.), and stop watching TV entirely for a long long time. Figure out what your triggers are and, I know this sounds corny but whatever, just say NO!

Really watch out with this.

Really watch out with this.

If you encounter 1 picture, it's probably not going to do any harm. But if you're going through 50 pictures or more, you're still getting an ammount of dopamine that you can't from real life.

There's no way to escape the

There's no way to escape the novelty aspect. It comes up with online dating sites (and even with new posts here).

Perhaps we're giving fantasy too bad a rap and lumping too many variations of fantasy into one box. Seeing a random women in the street and thinking only of what one might do in an objectifying way is probably bad. On the other hand, while relating to someone and not with them, it might be healthy to process one's perceptions of them in this way. For me, potential partners often creep into dreams and my thinking of them incrementally shifts from that process. Maybe it's a method of pre-processing potentialities and assembling boundaries. The more sexually charged the interaction, usually the less she is in my dreams. I guess it's some form of intellectual-emotional processing. Sexual attraction doesn't seem to generate that processing.

it's not having fantasy *as best you can*

in my book, it's as best you can, not absolute.

We can entertain a fantasy and play it out in our heads, consciously. Not good. Or we can have a trigger fantasy that appears when we see a beautiful young woman that pulls our strings. That's normal. But we should try not to *entertain* fantasies. And if we are rebooting really shutting down fantasy as much as possible seems to be very helpful.

How much difference is there

How much difference is there between triggered and generated? Triggered doesn't mean anything unless we allow it to go on. It might be weaker overall than those we generate.

Does that distinction apply to dreams?

Isn't everything as best one can? That's not to encourage excuses. If it is really one's best, that is the limit.

my point is...

...there is a "sit back and play a movie in your mind" type fantasy, or a "let's look at a series of bikini beauties" fantasy, and there is the random fantasy that appears in our minds. We want to avoid any conscious role we can.

I understand and yet want to

I understand and yet want to clarify. I see those scenarios as mindless. You are actively handing over the process to the less than conscious. If one could go through that mindfully as in say a self-guided meditation, it could be interesting and perhaps not as harmful.

Dreams are not necessarily entirely unconscious. One can start a path as one goes to sleep. And with lucid dreaming, one might be able to entirely stop or shift the dream. Then there is waking when one can go in and out of dreams. In those awake moments, it could also be possible to shift the dream. I've learned more sexual dreaming than from non-romantic dreaming.

Is this a Relapse ?

My friend sent me a picture, & I didn't know what it was so I thought I'd I take a look at it and it end up being something normal but it was a bikini pic of a model, which caused me to MO.

Will this cause me to start over ? Or Was it a setback ? or a relapse?

Even though I watched P then

Even though I watched P then MO I have no withdrawl symptons, I'm not gonna be hard on myself because that would lead to depression which would result to the same thing happening all over again but I can assure you that it it won't happen again.

Looking at the pic, draws you into P but I won't be looking at NO MORE PICS

Depends. Did or is it leading

Depends. Did or is it leading you to want to view porn? If it is then fight back. It only becomes a problem when it's YOU that seeks out the highly sexual images that it becomes a problem. And you only reset when you do PMO. You can't help the sexual images we see. We are bombarded with those images everywhere you turn.

Don't sweat it. As long as you didn't edge your good. I'm in class right now and my classmate decided jokingly to show me a porn video m. I told him to chill out and not show me. I didn't want to tell him I'm doing this PMO program because I would feel embarrassed. So he cut the video off though.

Peers will always think YOU might be okay with the sexual images because they see it as being okay.

Hope this helps!

just notice how you feel after a trigger

if you are a little excited, if you can't get thoughts out of your mind, then the trigger will hurt your progress. Simply avoid it next time.

Let the thoughts and excitement have their life, don't dwell on them but just be okay with them. They will pass. Resisting them will make them stronger. It's okay to have those thoughts and images that result from triggers.

It really is best to avoid them (the triggers) completely.

Thank Both of you

I didn't intend on watching P but the pic made it appealing, As far as my mood & attitude I'm all positive. I have no withdrawal symptoms, I meditated last night and everyday for 15 minutes, I stretch & exercise to increase penile bloodflow, I told myself that many people give up fights that they can easily win, I know I will win this fight against P.
But the question remains Will this be a setback ? or Will my progress will continue to get better?

Of course it will if you keep

No it's not a setback or ruin your progression. But of course it will set you back if you keep dwelling on it. Stop dwelling on that situation. Move on. It happened. It was out of your control that the photo was sent to your phone so get over it. Continue your progression of no PMO.

bruistopher wrote:

[quote=bruistopher]No it's not a setback or ruin your progression. But of course it will set you back if you keep dwelling on it. Stop dwelling on that situation. Move on. It happened. It was out of your control that the photo was sent to your phone so get over it. Continue your progression of no PMO.[/quote]
Thanks for clearing that up