Over the years, various forum members have contributed techniques for managing and balancing sexual energy. They can also be used by couples. Here's the collection:
What do you do to rechannel sexual energy when you don't have a partner, or your partner and you are not making love?
NOTE: These exercises can also be useful for (re)wiring the connection between sensation in your penis and awareness in your brain. This can speed erection recovery in those with porn-induced erectile dysfunction.
One guy said:
I read something about drawing the sexual energy upward, so it's not just concentrated in my pants. Well, it seems to work, but takes practice. I try to focus on feeling the energy up in my chest and upper body, and it makes me feel really powerful. It takes the pressure off of needing to masturbate, and kind of gives me this super "ready for action" feeling. Like I could tear down a house if I needed to, or throw a girl around and have my way with her (in a consensual, playful way of course ) I like it, and with a little more practice I might find myself enjoying getting turned on. Give it a try guys. Then go run a few miles or something (if you don't have a girl to throw around of course).
Various traditions offer "solo sexual cultivation practices." For example, here's an article, directed toward women, which discusses the benefits of energy circulation. Other techniques, recommended by site members, are below. (If these are too esoteric for your tastes, you may prefer to experiment with kegel exercises.)
Another guy discovered this:
It seems that most single people who find truth [that constant orgasm is not fulfilling] turn to a path of total abstinence. "No PMO" as many call it. I personally tried that path and it simply didn't work for me!!! I felt disconnected from not only from my sexuality, but from the intimate aspects of myself. So i gave up and went back to orgasming, almost daily...and it was just as unfulfilling as i remembered it to be!
And then I discovered solo tantra. The solo equivalent of karezza, if you will. And it's changed everything! The whole idea is to treat the sexual act like a meditation, rather than some uncontrollable animal impulse. I prefer to call it "genital massage" as opposed to masturbation (because masturbation to me is linked to orgasm!). So my whole technique involves a very SLOW, gentle, completely and totally relaxed genital massage, much like partnered karezza. The goal is to stay in the 60-70% arousal zone. If you go past that, you reach the "point of no return" and have no choice but to orgasm.
The goal of this solo technique is to awaken your own sexual bliss through a gentle, loving and meditative self-massage, and to let that blissful feeling fill up every single cell in your body. Once you have massaged yourself into a relaxed state of bliss, focus on your breath and feel every cell in your body radiating with creative energy. As you meditate on this feeling, your sexual parts will no longer be aroused but the bliss in your body will remain. It's like a natural high, and the feeling will last for hours if you do it right!!!I've gone 16 days without orgasm and have been using this method almost daily. It truly works for me, and I hope it works for you as well. If you're frustrated with your current inability to remain PMO free, then try this out!
One member commented:
Psychological interpretations of the old stories say the hero must first improve him/her self before bringing the gift to the world. And the gift turns out to be the shining self.
Note: Some find that the solo techniques are not useful at first (too stimulating), but are very useful for easing sexual frustration once balance is restored.
The 6th Tibetan Rite
Exercise Proper: Stand
1) Tensing Phase:
a) Stand straight up and slowly let all of the air out of your lungs. As you do this, bend over and put your hands on your knees. Force out the last trace of air, and then, with the lungs empty, return to a straight up posture.
b) Place your hands on your hips, and press down on them. This will push your shoulders up. As you do this, pull in the abdomen as much as possible, and at the same time raise the chest.
Said another way, tense all of your muscles, scrunch up your shoulders, clench your fists and place them on your hips. Claw your feet into the ground. Try to stay like this for a slow count of ten.
c) Hold this position as long as you possibly can if you can't make it to the end. When you are finally forced to take air into your empty lungs, let the air flow in through the nose.
2) Relaxation Phase:
a) When the lungs are full, exhale through the mouth. As you exhale, relax your arms, letting them hang naturally at your sides.
b) Then take several deep breaths through the mouth or nose, allowing them to escape through either the mouth or nose. The object is to completely relax between each of the Tensing Phases.
3) Repeat the rite if needed, but once is usually all you need.
The purpose of this Rite is to relieve a person of being horny. The reason for being horny (this is Mantak Chia's point of view which I have adopted) is that energy has accumulated in the sex organs. Then the more aroused a person gets, the more energy collects there. The energy is released at orgasm---unless you can draw it out of the sex organs in some way. The 6th Rite does this automatically without having to know how to move energy. It's a mechanical approach. Said one guy,
I must say - the Six Tibetans work amazingly well - within about 3 minutes I felt the energy built up in the genitals release and spread over all my body - i feel balanced and a boost of energy/happiness. You're only supposed to do the sixth one if you're planning on not spilling the seed - which is indeed my goal.
These instructions for the breathing practice known as "Fire Breath" were excerpted from Don Juan and the Art of Sexual Energy by Merilyn Tunneshende.
- Stand with your feet shoulder width apart, legs relaxed yet rooted, knees slightly bent. Hang your arms at your sides, loose and limp, fingers slightly curled. Be sure your spine is straight and your neck and shoulders are relaxed, maintaining good posture. Gaze softly into the distance.
- Now breathe in through the nostrils, pulling up on the muscles of the perineum and contracting the abdomen on the inhale. The energy should rise in the form of heat, to the area of contraction, which in this case is the umbilical area. Continue to breathe in this way until you feel the heat.
- Next, attempt to pull the warm energy up your spine and into the area of your your back heart. This is done by straightening the small of the back on the inhale, which is still accompanied by an abdominal contraction, with a softer perineal pull. As the energy rises to the back of your solar plexus, it will be come even warmer. Now, with additional inhales, accompanied by abdominal contractions, open the back shoulder blades by flexing them, curving your shoulders slightly inward. This will raise the energy into the back heart area and you will feel heat expanding into your arms and hands, which may throb or perspire. You may also feel flushed. This is normal.
- Straighten the curve at the back of the neck on the next inhale. An abdominal contraction is required, but the perineal pull is no longer necessary. Try to inhale with the back of your throat and ears – your gills, if you will – for you are now breathing more energy than air.
- One snort through the back sinuses, accompanied by an abdominal contraction, will send the breath into your inner eye, which will heat up, thereby expanding. This 'eye' is located about one inch back into the forehead, directly centered above the nose between the brows, perhaps three-quarters of an inch above them. The eye may throb and open if you are ready. This is essential for Seeing certain kinds of energy during a healing. Tip your head slightly forward and allow the heat to become moist as it moves toward the front, the liquid side of your body. You may feel an actual drip, as if warm oil or honey is oozing one drop at a time through your forehead.
- Now straighten your head and the drip will accumulate on your soft palate. Swallow this life-giving elixir and it will spread into your throat, opening this center and melting downward.
- The inhale for the front of the body is now a soft inhale accompanied by a deep abdominal expansion. This allows the energy to fill the front, as though you were pouring it into a wine skin.
- Inhale the warm liquid energy into the heart area by expanding the upper lungs. This will stimulate soft, gentle feelings of love. As the energy melts down further, it will hit the solar plexus and spin to the sides. Massage the warm current into your internal organs, the spleen to the left and the liver, pancreas and gall bladder to the right. Remember to continue expanding your abdomen on the inhale.
- From there, the energy proceeds downward diagonally from each side to collect in your reproductive area. An in-breath with an abdominal expansion will fill the bottom of your energetic lake.
- Finally, a gentle abdominal contraction on the exhale will return the energy to be stored in the center of will, behind the navel.
Own-body sexual yoga
The Complete Yoga advises the student to begin with solo practice aimed at learning both how to prolong sexual arousal, how to breathe, and how to conduct the life-current in the body-mind in a kind of circle that moves down the front of the body and then upward along the spine toward the crown of the head.
Sexual polarity is only “skin deep” - serving the purpose of physical reproduction. At deeper states of mind and body, polarity is transcended. By experiencing this sense of wholeness while celibate, a person can stop thinking of intimacy as a cure for “incompleteness.” At that point, a person is less likely to try to “get” something from a lover.
The “own-body yogic sexual practice” calls for the student to self-stimulate the genitals as a conscious exercise or devotional exercise. Orgasm is generally avoided, and the aroused sexual energy breathed down the front of the body and exhaled up the spine in a relaxed manner. The celibate practitioner should engage in this exercise both as a training for sex with a partner, and whenever there is a feeling of concentrated or suppressed sexual energy in the sexual organs, head or heart.
Said one forum member:
I was actually thinking about karezza one night and started, out of the blue idk why, breathing quick deep breaths from the belly. It produced a very strong tingling/vibration sensation over my whole body. I kept it up for as long as i could. Then i bathed in the tingles/vibrations for a good 5 minutes or so. I ended up doing research and found out it's actually a breathing technique called Bhastrika.
"Letting go" meditation
Alice Bunker Stockham MD, suggested this daily meditation for releasing excess sexual energy. Sit for 15-20 minutes in a straight-backed chair.
Drop the hands and arms to the side; rest the feet squarely on the floor; drop the chin forward on the breast, and give up all control of the body. Let go; knees, feet, toes, arms, hands and finger-tips must become relaxed; eyelids, mouth, indeed every part of the body must let go; throat jaws and stomach may be last to yield, but repeat to yourself "I give up. I give up." Breathe quietly and slowly. Remain in this state of repose 15-20 minutes.
When a perfect state of relaxation is secured, you quietly will the inner consciousness to use your sexual energy for renewal. You will arise, buoyant, vigorous and rejuvenated. You have become master of your own life through an alchemic process, a transmutation of creative energy. All local exitation and demand vanish. ("The Lover's World" by A.B. Stockham MD, pp. 105-106)
For awakening sexual energy - Start doing two things: every morning, after your sleep, stand in the middle of the room and start shaking the whole body. Become a shaker — shake the whole body from the toe to the head and feel that it is almost orgasmic…as if it is giving you a sexual orgasm. Enjoy it, nourish it, and if you start feeling that you would like to make a few sounds, make them, and just enjoy it — for ten minutes.
Then rub the whole body with a dry towel and take a shower. Do this every morning, and within two or three weeks the balance will come. Link
Conservation of Seminal Energy
Technique: When the sex-centre is stimulated, ejaculation of semen takes place. This method checks it effectively. If there is a thought of sexual desire in the mind, be alert. Concentrate your mind on genitals and contract the genitals inwards towards the belly, just as piston is pulled outwards to fill the pump with water. This is called Yoni Mudra. Then shut your eyes. Meditate, "Now I am looking upwards from lower sex-organs to the thousand petalled lotuses (Sahasrara Chakra) in brain within my body." The seminal energy flows to whatever point (organ) the mind is focused on. If you focus the mind on Sahasrara Chakra, the bioelectric energy, which would have otherwise, been wasted in ejaculation through the activated Muladhara Chakra, will be sublimated upwards to the Sahasrara Chakra and will be transmuted into Ojas. But mind well. If your mind is still covetous of sex-pleasure, you will not succeed in preserving seminal energy. But if you practice for a few days with discrimination and strong will, you will get abundantly its rewards. You will directly experience that even though sexual desires come with a force of storm, with this technique applied, they subside within a few seconds.
Another technique: Whenever any strong sexual desire arises, exhale all the air from lungs completely and retain the breath out. Then contract your belly and take your navel back towards the spinal cord. By repeating this two-three times, the passion is pacified and you will be saved from seminal discharge. This technique is very simple but it is a very important Yogic maneuver. Air in the lungs is called Apaana Vayu. With the strengthening of Apaana Vayu the sexual organ awakens and the mind becomes troubled. By forceful expiration of air, Apaana Vayu is weakened. So it cannot activate the sex-centre. Moreover, by contracting the belly and navel backwards, the remaining energy in the sex-centre goes towards the navel. So there is no more energy left to activate sex-centre and thus ejaculation is prevented. This technique could be practiced in any place, without spending any money. This technique should be practiced regularly even when there is no sexual stimulation. It gives excellent benefits.
Palm-genital energy flow
I’ve made the following observations by experimenting on myself. I’ve used palm touching on various areas of my body and observe. The physical pressure of the palm is less than the fingers, but the energy seems higher, and more neutral and healing.
Next time you guys feel the urge, take a few moments to breathe and observe while cupping yourself with only your palm. If you're erect, gently place your palm on the head in stillness. This seems cooling for the urge. This can help even if you have already wandered partially down the old paths. Think of it as a parachute out.
Have you tried circulating sexual energy before going to sleep? You can use either hand to gently cup your penis and put your other hand over your chest or heart. More palm and less finger pressure seems to work best. You can also try resting the your hand across your groin so that the back of your hand, roughly in the vee-shape area between your thumb and index finger, rests gently against your scrotum or penis. Do what is comfortable. The idea is less movement so that energy can flow. You might not notice anything. Sometimes I do and sometimes I don't. I can even do this one-handed now. The other night I just put a hand over my heart and I could feel energy running between my brain and penis.
When sexually frustrated, I practice relaxing my vagina muscles and breathing as smoothly as possible. I place my hand over my vagina and gently caress. It really calms me a lot. I place the other hand right under my left breast (to reach my heart)...and keep it there. That helps as well. I go right to sleep as the tension in my vagina sllloooowwwwwlllllyyy subsides along with the urgency of the sexual impulse. I am very happy when I wake up in the morning.
I think this method shows the importance of not ignoring the sexual appetite. We need to address it directly from time to time.
The T5T routine
as developed by Carolinda Witt.
Male Multiple Orgasm
This book by Mantak Chia [Daoist] has numerous exercises for rechanneling sexual energy throughout the body. It helps to practice his exercises in a non-orgasmic, non-ejaculatory manner. Keys: Moderation, Relaxation, and Spirit of Gratitude.
Also see Meditation