is it okay to listen gf's sex audio?

Submitted by tyler on
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I quited porn and masturbate 1.5 years ago.

but I got a new hobby

I record voice with my smartphone when I have sex with my GF

and I listen these recordings everyday repeatedly

I do this since we meet once a week so we cant have sex often

I dont masturbate listening these but I got a erection and aroused.

I sex only with my gf and no problem when having sex

Is this bad?

As long as it doesn't interfere with your

enjoyment of real sex, nothing is "bad."  The risk with watching porn (for example), is that you train your brain to need constant novelty and certain "views" to become aroused. I suppose there's some risk that you could train your brain to need certain sounds, but it sounds like it would be a minimal risk. What matters is your experience.

i would say not to do it

this in my experience is a very dopamine driven behavior that can result in much worse erections and less sharp and interesting sexual encounters. You can observe your feelings carefully and it may not be the case for you, but beware of that possibility.

I find that any "edgy" behavior that isn't involving your woman in bed with you having sex has the potential. Especially if it is arousing, especially so. But it may depend upon your age and your experience. Again, just be aware that this is a strong possibility.

I agree with emerson

It sounds edgy and dopamine driven.

I'd suggest an alternative. When you are not together, both of you crawl into bed, call each other on the phone, and talk if you like, or don't talk and just listen to each other breathe. Imagine that you are cuddling together.

Think of it as phone cuddling - not phone sex!

I did that for several months and found it very enjoyable and satisfying.

It can be used as a stepping stone

During your listening times, imagine that you are doing kind things for your partner/ with your partner. In this way your body will associate the intense neurology with love for this beautiful being and not so much the opportunity for peak dopamine responses. It is sort of the philosophy behind what is known as an exchange. You are retraining your body's pleasure expectations into something generous rather than something hunting.

This, then leads into the new training of your nervous system in which giving of any kind is pleasurable, without the expectation of a return transaction. The true value in the context of relationship in letting go of expectation is that your partner will be aware of this change consciously or nonconsciously, and it will remove pressure on her. The result is that she becomes more spontaneous[honest] in her giving.

Pay attention to the energies in your nervous system when doing this,and how they flow and change positions. It will make you wiggle, and do not forget to use the invaluable recirculation as often as needed..

To Answer Your Question In A Word, NO!

Dude really, this just sounds totally creepy to me. Recording you and your girlfriend having sex and listening to it over and over again; does she even know that you are recoding it or you just doing it surreptitiously? A sexual relationship is based on trust and if you are doing this without her knowledge and consent that can totally destroy your relationship.

I told my girlfriend last night that I wanted to record us having sex on my phone and then I could listen to it when she wasn’t with me—basically your same scenario. I did this to see what her reaction was. She had this horrified look on her face and said, “You want to do what! That’s gross.” As some background we are not prudes by any means. We are both college students, this fall will be our senior year. We party and whatever just like everybody else here, maybe even a little more than the average student at times. We have very few boundaries for sex, one is total monogamy. We have even goofed around once with a video, which was immediately deleted afterwards.

Bottom line is my girlfriend gives you about a 6 or 7 on the creeper scale. She brought out another good point, have you never butt dialed someone? You have this on your phone and you accidentally send it to your mom. She thinks, “Oh great a nice MP4 from tyler.” My guess is she would need intensive therapy afterward. It doesn’t need to go to your mom either; you don’t want anybody to accidentally listen to that, at least I hope not.

I agree with those that counseled against it. I see nothing good coming from recording sex with someone you are in a relationship with and sitting and obsessively listening to it over and over again. This will eventually have a negative effect on both you and the relationship.