Need help and support

Submitted by Dave2770 on
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Guys, hello. Ive been on and off with MO.

I cant stop unless I have a bunch of you help me and give me hope and support. Its hard to quit, this is why I cant do it alone.

Please help encourage me, I really need all of your help.

God bless you all.

Thanks.

If I dont get help and

If I dont get help and encouragement Im just going to kill myself.

Dont you guys understand that we're in this together. Without you guys and this support forum, none of us could ever lead happier, PMO abandoned lives.

In fact, PMO should not even be something that clicks in our minds, it should be out of our conscious/conscience forever not just backlocked in our minds and kept away like a maniac in jail.

So please guys, give me some encouragement. Its day 1 or day 7 of no P. Lets go through this thing together, and we'll make it.

I want 8 replies out of 10 views, I truly nees all the help and energy I can get. If I can get through two weeks of this, then i will have suceeded and been cleansed. So, lets do this.

You Can

Don't get too down on yourself man. You are human and you have weaknesses. Also, don't depend on others for your recovery. Everybody here is super nice, very supportive, understanding, and sympathetic. But in the end, you're the only one who can do the heavy lifting on your own addiction. It is a strange thing to go through something with others and all on your own at the same time, but that's what it ultimately is. You can do it though. It takes most people several tries, but as long as you keep trying, you haven't been defeated. Try to think positive. Force yourself to do fun things that you enjoy outside of your house. Maybe get into a good book that will capture your attention when you are home. But most of all, learn to believe in yourself. People replying to your comments is not going to drag you across the finish line. Only you can do that. But first you have to realize that you CAN do it. And we'll all be rooting for you from here in the cyber sidelines. Good luck friend!

I'm in it with you too. I

I'm in it with you too. I just relapse this evening at around 6:20PM U.S. eastern time. Having others help and encouraging is a plus. Motivation is needed. I certainly do. Reading the articles Gary and Marnia provide and reading Cupid's Poison Arrow is going to have my brain pretty occupied these next couple of weeks. It's almost 11PM and I'm tired. Restless. Hopefully tomorrow isn't as bad as the previous other days.

Stay strong broski. You can do it.

And thats another things,

And thats another things, thanks for your help but empty responses dont do anything. They never do. Can you guys just spare 10 seconds od your time writing a well thought out response?

God.

Hey Dave

I can tell you're really hurting--I know, we've all been there at some point. A lot of us, myself included, have had days when everything feels completely and totally hopeless. Even if bruistopher's post (and mine) feels empty, we really do understand. I'm not very good at verbalizing it, but I do.

Have you had days this bad before? If so, those bad days eventually came to an end, right? So will this one. I know how this kind of depression messes with you--it makes you believe you have always and will always feel this awful, but this is not true, you WILL feel better soon.

Do you have someone you can call or hang out with right now? I wish I could help more, but the truth is text on a forum can only help so much, and right now, you need much more than any of us can give you here. Please, please, talk to one of your friends. Invite someone over, just to hang out. If you feel like you really do want to kill yourself, then google "suicide hotline" and call whichever number pops up--those counselors are great, they are warm and understanding and they won't judge you, and they'll help you move forward from here. I hope this helps at least a little bit.

Achh, ive been feeling 'good'

Achh, ive been feeling 'good' for the past week or two. Longer, but i like this shitty state. One cant and shouldnt be happy and great all the time unless theyre completely sure of themselves.

I dont want this state to pass for a long time. I dont want to be comforted, thats the kind of thing that gets people illusioned and makes them fall to the same poisons again.

I dont care about anything anymore. I need a complete new change, but i like being here even more. Something about this hopelessness feels far better than anything else.

Whats out there for me if I 'enlighten' myself? A couple of friends and girlfriends? Im so sick and tired of playing these games.

I dont like being happy and giddy at times like this, and I especially dont like the hope drug, especially on day 1.

Nothings changed whatsoever. I may have went 20 days without PMO, but for the next 32 ive been on and off doing this, and each time because ai had a sick thrill of torturing myself or something. I dont see a future for me and have no hope currently and dont want to.

I live in a mess and Im a grandson of a multi millionaire. I dont get any help and on top of that have to carry much of the world on my shoulders.

Pretending theyre not there is not cutting it, and no one should just get up and go as if nothinga happened. I bet most of you have some major wounds, why dont yoou guys tend to them rather than take a hope drug or whatever vitamins or drugs and keep going regardless.

The first time i hit 20 days was when I felt like this, and I grew more intensely and greatly than ever, the moment I allowed some 'happiness' or 'goodness' to come in is when I MO'd, which now, has been 32 days where on and off Ive been losing more time.

Honestly I may feel alive when 'happy', but truly I feel more dead when I cant even actually have all my problems cleared and out of me.

Fakeness does not cut it in my world. Ive been feeling good and happy, in a state of well being for the last month, but what do I have, nothing. Nothing at all.

I cant stand to cower my emotions, I see more clearly now then ever before. I dont need your hope or encouragement neither. I need you to agre, to truly understand what it means to really see whats going on.

Masquerading is easy, yet none of you could ever dare to come to this clarity, it only feels like shit becaus its been held back and locked away for so long.

Maybe you guys truly arent like this, or dont feel like this, but I do, and this is my truth.

At this moment it almost has nothing to do with PMO, but PMO has truly intensified this great pain and truth inside.

Wish you the best of luck but

Wish you the best of luck but ima be honest and say i dont respect the fact that u are talkin about killing yourself if u dont get support .... Thats pretty lame if u ask me .... U should want to do dis because uve seen all the pain, the heartbreak, and the failures uve went through not because whether or not sum bloggers typed a few sentences in ur blog ... Not sayin that hasnt helped me but for u to make a few comments of encouragement a "decide all factor" in helpin u get on ur way to recovery is definitely not the right way to go about it .... So wat if u fail once? So wat if u fail twice? So wat if u even fail a third or fourth time? U just gotta kno where ur tryin to go, remember all the times and situations that you failed in because of dis disease and get back up and try again .... Each attempt only gets easier .... Sheesh i remember back in august wen i first started dis PMO battle and i couldnt even grt past day 10 .... Like literally i had to have relapsed at around that same day 10 at least 4 or 5 times .... Now im day 43 of no PMO and im currently tryin to beat my last record of 56 days of no PMO and i kno i can ... Y? Bcuz i kno the only thing stoppin me is me .... And even wen i do hit that record i want to keep going until as long as i have sex and i vowed that i will never masturbate again .... Ok maybe that sounds extreme but that is my goal ... No more porn and no more masturbation ... How about if i fail and MO again? You get back up and TRY AGAIN .... nobody is perfect but wit the more work and practice the more closer to perfection u will get .... So stop makin sympathetic/pathetic excuses on y u want to give up and keep fighting bcuz it dont matter how many comments u get on dis blog bcuz only u can fight dis battle for yourself .... Remember ur your own man so u gotta act like one

*big hug*

There's no quick fix for neurochemical imbalance. Time and patience and using some of the ideas here to help regulate your mood swings are all I can think of to help. ♦Solo Tools

Also, it can help to know others have gone through similar horrible feelings: WITHDRAWAL

And come out on the other side: BENEFITS

What about finding a 12-Step program in your area? Human contact can help you sort yourself out, and you will find a lot of wisdom from recovering addicts.