porn induced?

Submitted by badlife1234 on
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well let me start off that im still a virgin. Im 20 years old. Ive been masturbating since like 10. I started using porn around 14 and i masturbated to it like everyday. I tried to stop a couple times but i could not. I couldnt get an erection with my girlfriend and i think i got a combination of porn addiction and sexual anxiety.. But now i stopped all masturbation and porn for about 5 months. I should be recovered right? But its still hard to get an erection. Maybe because i worry about it and have sexual anxiety?..what can i do?

do you fantasize about sex

It's wonderful that you have given up porn and masturbation for five months. That is a major achievement.

One thing to keep in mind is fantasy -- fantasy can affect your progress because your brain sees it the same way as it sees porn.

Second thing and probably the #1 one to think of is that you need to have contact with girls. You are probably at a point where that is very important. I wouldn't worry too much about erections on their own happening or not happening. The key is real girls at this point. How is that going?

Yeah for sure. I actually do

Yeah for sure. I actually do have a girlfriend right now and we do mess around. She actually has given me 2 handjobs but my penis was half erext >=[. is it bad for progress if she masturbates me?..I told her about my problems too

the more you can have snuggling

bonding, hugging, laying naked with her, and non-orgasmic messing around, the better. That is really the key. If you can spend an hour or so with her naked cuddling and so forth, as often as possible, that is fantastic for your progress, at least it has been for me. I think it's the key to recovery really. Makes sense, right? Better not to have sex where you have to perform though. That increases anxiety and isn't great right now...

 

My guess is likely she's a

My guess is likely she's a little nervous too and that might come through in her "hand jobs", which would affect your penis' reaction. When I was younger and had a lot less experience, I was super nervous giving guys head cause I thought I was supposed to make them hard and if I didn't, there was something wrong with what I was doing. She needs to know that it's not her job to make you hard. Do you like her touch, even if you don't get hard? If so, tell her. And if you want her to touch you differently, direct her. I know as I relaxed and enjoyed it, when I got the 'taste' for giving blow jobs and just enjoyed the feel of my guys penis on my lips, tongue and fingers, whether he's hard or soft, it was pure pleasure for me and my partners would feel that too. (ahegm, excuse me while I eat some ice)...

Regardless, I agree wholeheartedly with Emerson's naked cuddling advice. Take the pressure off both of you and revel in the oxytocin and other love chemicals.