I mean...wow...I was addicted to porn before and I stopped it and.....okay, I'm not addicted anymore (since long time) but.....I was continuing with regular masturbation all that time, since one day I noticed that if I didn't do anything for 3 days I get extreme rush of energy and everything changes, still I thought that's a signal for me to masturbate again, so I did and so on and so on.... By the way all this time I had a bit of social anxiety, communication with girls and with any people whatsoever wasn't going good, I was anxious, kind of depressed, should I say stupid may be, for not remembering many things, forgetting, not able to express myself in words the way I wanted,not motivated, I had lost the motivation for living, I wasn't productive at all, and kill me, I never knew what was wrong with me, I tried everything, thoughts, mind reporgramming bla bla, food regime, fitness, swimming !! NO!!!
I started noticing though that if I didn't do anything for 4-5 days in sexual aspect, I just started changing so much that I was kind of super shocked and may be got scared and Mstrbed again....before 10 days I decided to push it to the maximum and see what happens, since I read in this forum that abstinence does mircales..o m g, I so much regret of living the life I've lived :( A new dimension opened for me, my brain, my senses....I lost any any any sign of social anxiety, anxiety at all, i have energy for everything, no depression at all, I returned my MOTIVATION FOR LIFE and I know now why I didn't have it before, because I didn't feel something deep inside me, something that should push every human being into living and enjoying, I didn't feel the entire pleasure of everything, girls, sports any activity whatsoever was like minus 70% joy compared to anything I do now,,,,I don't know what happened really, I'm still getting over the negative thoughts that I missed that thing all my life and I'm enjoying my new life new!!! I don't know what the hell happened....it wasn't even PORN it was MASTURBATION itself, i didn't masturbate for any porn whatsoever, I forgot porn few years ago, I masturbated on normal everyday thoughts about girls etc etc, Í guess something is deeply wrong with me since only a simple act of M. can do that to me....or may be because I was porn addict all my life before that, I don't know....i mean come on, that's like a simple release of testosterone?!?!! May be I had some medical condition connected with a lack of testosterone I have no idea!I Or perhaps not, because before when I had sex with girls, I felt good and everything kind of improved but only and only after masturbation I was somehow damaging myself..so it's not about the testosteron itself even....I am so so clueless!! Anyway! I just wrote this post to say how amazing life is and that I have this deep profound feeling in me, I feel it in my chest, it's like butterflies from every moment I live, I'm so happy guys!!!! and my sexual energy is simply, amazingly strong, I mean, I don't have to do anything, anything at all, and i attract the girls, a simple HI and HOW ARE YOU and a smile and I can clearly see that the girl likes me not as a FRIEND(all my lifE) but as a GUY and I see the signals she's sending(ok I'm kind of handsome and nice body but this wasn't helping me at all before, not it helps may be, I don't know how much exactly...)....but what's different, I feel pleasure from any communicatoin I do with everybody, it just feels good, before i didn't feel that so I wasn't really myself when communicating....I don't know, that's just sick....HOW CAN THAT BE HAPPENING? And that's all accompanied with a strong buzz down there and getting excited from minor details from the girls and wanting to have connection with them, not only sexual by far....by any means, connection, communcation, flirting, sex, LOVE, anything....10 friggin days changed let's say 10 years of weird , depressed, anxious LIFE, 10 DAYS? Really? Really? What is wrong with my brain.....I'll just won't do anything to see how far this goes, I mean, I feel like I can do a lot of intellectual activity of any kind right now, I just see things differently, as if my brain neurons speeded up 10 times and made all the connections I needed to have before....HAHA I almost feel like in this movie ,,Limitless,, So guys, if you are a former porn addicts, have any of the symptoms I've listed and even more and you masturbate every 1 or 2 days, just stop COLD TURKEY and Wait Wait Wait!!! There is hope....if I went to a doctor they would've probably diagonsed me with all kind of stuff and give me who knows what pills.....Thank you thank you thank you Marnia, Gary, forum people, thank you, I love you all and I feel it in my chest :) BYE!!!!
Im 26 by the way....and also I'm still far from the thought that masturbation is harmful or bad for the majority of guys..because I see many enjoying fully the life and almost everybody masturbates, I guess an individual thing.. :( :( :( anyway, I can live without that !!!