This is for those who started on extreme genres of porn and had little/ no wiring to real females

Submitted by Spiritualhealing1988 on
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Will my fetish ever go away completely? Or will it just be an existent neurological pathan that's been weakened? Once I have required to normal sexual behaviors, how does the intimate sexual experience differ from the purely lust based fetish orgasm? Since the dopamine that is released during bonding sex will be counteracted with oxytocin as well I understand that there will not be as extreme of a chase effect. But is it going to be enough to keep one from seeking the pure dopamine rush derived from indulging in fetishes? I hope that the former will be more of a whole complete experience, which in turn will be the primary experience one seeks out. Can anyone tell me how they would compare the real life bonding to getting off on fetish porn or even getting off to fetish activities with say.... A dominatrix, escort, etc.? To me I believe that for every aspect of a person there is a dark side and a light side. Fetish=dark, karezza bonding sex= light. Any thoughts?

If you think about it,

adolescents take a few years to wire solidly to real potential mates. As you get older, the same process could take longer.

What has your experience been so far?

Not sure what you mean by a dark and light side. As the saying goes, "Feed the wolf you want in your life, and the other one starves to death."

it's simpler than that, SpiritualHealing

Like Marnia says, if you pay attention and reinforce real sex with real partners, that's what your brain will respond to and build memories and desires for, not anything else. The rest fades away. Fetishes and so forth will become fading memories. They may always be a trigger but they're no big deal anymore. Whatever you don't pay attention to fades away in life.

 

I have this problem as well.

I have this problem as well. I'm several months into the rebooting process but haven't had time to try intercourse or anything else sexual yet. I hope that I can put away the "dark" side, because the stuff that I was into when I watched porn was so extreme that I just don't think any woman is able / willing to replicate that in the bedroom. And as my desire for porn overall has decreased, so has my desire to indulge in those fetishses.