Why is it so quiet in here?!

Submitted by Jcjoubert13 on
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Hi there
Hope all of you are well!!
Either everyone is so busy with their practice, or not enough hahahah.
Its been a while since anyone noted anything in here, and I think, as strong or busy the Nofap movement is, we need to also express our what we do more freely, as it's nothing to be embarrassed or shy about...
What do you guys think?

All is Well for Me

I agree with you, that periodic updates in practice or thinking from folks is a great idea. Thanks for the prompt.

I thoroughly appreciate and enjoy being continent. It makes me physically stronger, emotionally anchored, and more forgiving. My wife seems to be ever so slowly warming to Karezza (although she still states that she thinks it is not natural and is not the right path for us).

I have learned that Karezza is not a panacea for me. I have learned that I need to work at being a better communicator, instead of assuming my wife-of-approaching-30 years can and will read my mind or my body language and will know what path or actions I think we should take. I thought Karezza would make all bumps in the road go away. It has not, for me, or for my wife. It has smoothed the road. But, I have to be conscious of my unspoken assumptions and body language, know and control them, and use words and actions to convey what I want or feel. It is a big change for me. Up until 10 years ago or so, I had this naive sense that all people thought the same way and felt the same things, if only they thought things through logically. Big, dumb, incorrect assumption by me. I now know that we are truly different in countless ways, and that there is good in that. And, I know that such differences often make day-to-day life interesting and rewarding, but challenging, too.

Related, I was hamstrung for much of my life because I was solely logic-driven and bottled up my emotions, which made for great success in my professional life. And, it was a good complement to my caring wife in the raising of our children. But, I now realize that my Mr. Spock approach to life caused me to run roughshod, emotionally, over my wife and children.

Karezza, meditation, and maturity has made it easier for me to express my negative emotions in a controlled fashion. That is a big, important improvement for me. Karezza has bound me emotionally to my wife, which is a big, important state for me. But, I have work to do -- nothing out of the ordinary, I think, just the same stuff that any long-term committed couple has to sort through -- to appropriately give voice to my preferences with my wife, and in an effective fashion.

I think No Fap is a great analog for us folks on the Karezza path. I would appreciate periodic links to compelling reports from the No Fap folks or any research that commends that practice.

Hi John!

Thanks for sharing. I too identified very strongly with Mr Spock. I also thought that sex was for orgasmic release. I basked in the emotional support of the physical contact without understanding that part. In my ignorance I used many women. My spouse became my sex prop. Cupid's Poisoned Arrow, this forum and Marnia's compassion helped me to sort things out (grow up?). Karezza is for my spouse. She does not particularly like being touched by me. I should add that she has had two gift certificates for professional massage and not used them. I karezza myself and orgasm about once every 5 days. I've gone 90 days without orgasm and this 5 day cycle seems to fit me well.

old members do visit

It's hard to leave this site because although life is good everything is wonderful, it is still interesting to come back. I check every day. It is very slow for many months but there are occasional nuggets and it is always valuable to stay in touch.

I think Karezza gets into your life and it's perfect. It's a perfect gem and nothing can be improved or done and there is just satisfaction.

It is the one thing in life that can be no better than it is.

That means most people come here, stay awhile and then leave.

Re NoFap, personally I find masturbation holds no attraction for me and hasn't for many years now. Nor do novel sexual positions or women other than my wife. Karezza satisfies me on all levels.

No Fap

Me, I like to hear success stories from fellow continent males. I find those stories here, from fellow practitioners of Karezza. No Fap is another source of success stories, or research, from fellow continent males. That’s my sole interest in No Fap.

Thanks for response gents

Hi there
Thanks for the responses
Yes I definitely hear both of your views and understand both. Like John mentions, it's great for men to hear others men's stories of success and also failure, cause not everyone is open about both.
But when you see others having the same successes or failures as you, even though you are shy to share, it slowly breaks down those walls to share, and a strong community is forged.
I bet the first guy to start no fap movement must have been rediculed or mad fun of at first, and now it exploded.
But couples need this info, and only through real world people sharing, others can follow suit.
The spiritual stuff etc is amazing, especially if you are into going deeper with it, but for some it's too much whoop whooo, and people lose interest.
The science, and that's why marnia book is so important, shows it's not just whoo whoo, but real, and that is where everyone can relate, regardless of your background..
So I say, share freely and you don't know whose relationship or life you might change

Take care all