I've heard various people around here and elsewhere talk about "withholding" or "denying" orgasm. I may have even used that language myself, but I've decided it's not the best way to talk about it. Why? It immediately sets up an inner conflict. To deny or withhold something is to refuse to give something to someone who wants it. So already you're assuming that someone (your partner? your primitive brain?) wants an orgasm, and you're being stingy by not providing it. In this drama you've created by this way of talking or thinking, you are not the hero!
I like the word "decline" better. If you decline orgasm the connotations are more neutral. It means that someone if offering something (an orgasm) to you and you are politely refusing. It becomes as simple as being offered a second piece of cake by your hostess but declining because you know it will give you a tummy ache. There's no conflict involved.
Anybody else have an opinion on this?