I've been reading this forum for a while now. Among the people here who are trying to quit porn/masturbation/etc., I've seen a few different approaches, sometimes at different times from the same people.
A certain group isn't certain whether they have an addiction, but wants to try abstaining as a sort of experiment in self-improvement.
Another group has generally hit bottom and just wants to stop, plain and simple.
The third group is determined to find a way to "fix" themselves and "regain control" of their sexual urges. I wish to express that I'm not wanting to judge or criticize anyone. This kind of thinking is quite natural and we all engage in it at times, but I do want to point out that there are certain dangers entailed in it.
First, a few of the most respected writers on addiction have pointed out that the illusion that we can "control" or "handle" an addiction somehow is really a deception that only ends up feeding the addiction itself further. In truth I think we can never control our urges, only learn to steer around them and avoid giving them more fuel. I liken this to meditation or mindfulness training. For example, a credible teacher will never instruct anyone to "control" their anger (which, after all, is impossible), merely to embrace the feeling gently while refusing to act on it.
Second, to believe that we are somehow "broken" in a way that can be fixed by willpower or external means is often to do great violence to ourselves. Actually, in the vast majority of cases, our bodies and minds are self-healing as long as they are given appropriate circumstances. To trust in this ability contributes greatly to our emotional well-being. Conversely, what does it say when we judge ourselves or others as somehow flawed and in need of correction? The difference between fixing and healing is subtle, but I think it's important. Are we machines? Can your VCR heal itself? If a machine breaks, it becomes useless, but a person who is hurt doesn't lose any value, even if healing takes a lot of time and support.
Third, believing in the possibility of control through external means often leads to extreme measures or quick fixes that distract us from the real issue. I think it's a great idea to do what we can to support recovery through gradual changes in diet, exercise, etc., but it's possible to overdo these things. Likewise, it's easy to turn to a drug or supplement for a "solution." Unfortunately, unless it was a nutritional imbalance that caused the problem in the first place, this approach is no solution. For most of us, the root of the problem is growing up in a profoundly hurting and unhealthy society or family, and there is no supplement or pill that can "fix" that pain. There are a thousand distractions available to anesthetize ourselves, but the real and healthy message of that pain is that we need to begin as soon as possible not to fix anything with shortcuts, but to begin the long task of creating real healing in ourselves, our families, our communities, and the world.
Finally, believing that we need to "fix" everything ourselves leaves a very large burden on our shoulders and no room at all for grace. Somewhere we need to leave a space that allows for our own imperfections, and for a larger miraculous and merciful property of the Universe to transform those shortcomings into something beautiful. At least, I do, or else I just fall into despair.