3 weeks no porn-then porn--not aroused--some observations

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So, I haven't had the desire to give up masturbation, that I used to have, but that may come back to me. But I can still share some thoughts about porn and what it's like to not view it for a long, long time.

I've gone for a week at a time tops without porn, but up until last night it was over three weeks. I went out and had some drinks and came home and was a little susceptible so I figured "oh, why not, just watch naked women. Who cares."

Problem was after all this time, it didn't do anything for me. I have been spending way more time with real women lately, introducing myself to women, having conversations, and no sex but I have had some romantic encounters that required lots of being very close, and lots of physical touch, even if they didn't really lead beyond that.

After having all this exposure to real women, that in itself gets addictive (in a good way). I find I am better interacting with them, and the better I am, the more I want to do it. Then the next day I get these nice feelings of inner calm, probably some of those bonding chemicals are getting produced that Marnia talks about... and I just feel good and I think back at what I said, what the girl said, just all those subtle things.

Which is so different from porn. At one point I could go and watch porn for hours, but I think what has happened is that my body and mind have adapted and have been accustomed to being around real girls, and they won't allow me to be aroused by a 2-D substitute anymore. It's just not interesting or arousing. And I wanted to be aroused by it. But it's all body parts and anonymous people. Looking into someone's eyes, hearing their voice say your name, feeling their hands on you, seeing the curves of her body in real-life, that is amazingly different than porn, and it just FEELS better to be around real girls.

That's the best I can explain it. I would suggest to guys who are watching lots of porn and who don't have partners, to just get out and at least BE around women. I go to a bar that is full of them so I've learned to feel comfortable in that setting, but now that I've been doing it regularly for a few months now, it's like night and day.

Being around people in general, and women especially, will simply take care of some of these addictive tendencies.We're supposed to be with others. That's why it feels so good and the more you do it, the more you want to do it.

Take care.

Great post

Thanks for sharing your progress.

Glad we can't be replaced by 2-D pics, because you guys sure are cute in real life, too! Wink Thanks for brightening your life and the lives of those you touch.

When someone opposes real

When someone opposes real women and romantic relations to porn, I really do not understand how my botfriend can be addicted after 4 years of intimate relationship with me. Not to count that he had a few more girlfriends before.

If getting along with real woman brings that kind of perception of porn as described in the post above, why can some still be addicted in stable (and I would even say happy) relationships?


My thought is that

a happy stable relationship can withstand a lot of stuff...including some porn use. That said, after what I've learned in the last few years, I'm not positive that porn use is ever totally free of effects. That is, I'd always wonder if the relationship would be even happier without it.