I stumbled across your website the other day and I'm so glad that I did, because it has already changed my life. Reading your forums and insights has been a wake-up call and I'm incredibly grateful for such an amazing resource - thank you!
I'm in my mid-twenties and for as long as I can remember I've masturbated to help me to get to sleep at night. Without psychoanalysing myself too much, it all started when I was sent to boarding school at a really young age, as I learnt, as a coping mechanism that the buzz of orgasm helped me to feel safe at night.
This never really changed upon entering into adult life, as it continued to be a way for me to deal with stress, continuing to masturbate every night to get to sleep. Unfortuantley, as I got older, to keep this going I had to find new ways to reach climax - i.e. pornography, erotic stories, fantasies etc that got more and more disturbing to my 'rational mind' over time. Of course, now I think about it and after reading this site, it sounds exactly like a drug addiction.
After finding this website I've now been cold turkey for a week. To begin with it was really difficult, as I really struggled getting to sleep, but with the help of my girlfriend and a stubbornness to succeed I'm winning through. I'm just amazed at the difference it has made already! I think I'm getting some withdrawal symptoms as I get really intense bouts of irritability, but this is outweighed by everything else - I have so much more energy, I'm less moody, I have more enthusiasm and motivation for work, I don't feel drained all the time and I feel a deeper sense of connection with everything around me.
But the biggest change it has made is in my relationship. My girlfriend and I have been experimenting with the Exchanges and we feel so much closer to each other already. The only thing is that I can feel a real 'charge' of energy building in my body and it's getting a lot harder to resist the old habits - I've been watching movies, reading and browsing this website to help distract me so far.
It's also been a real adjustment for my girlfriend, who has always had a much higher sex drive than me (no surprise there) and she still wants to have sex - I've managed to do this so far without reaching orgasm, but it feels like slippery slope as my girlfriend wears a coil and she really misses feeling me climax.
I really want to keep this going, but how do I accommodate my girlfriend's needs / desires too, as they aren't always going to be the same as mine?