Question about watching porn as a test?

Submitted by vm22 on
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Okay, it's been 7 days and I decided to look at some porn again. Yesterday I saw a little bit just to see what it felt like. I realized just a few clips got me hard real quick which tells me that I've really linked my neuralplasticity to porn.

So tonight I wanted to check it again. I think part of it was that I felt a craving as well. This time I watched it for a longer period and played with myself a bit but did not orgasm.

So my question is, does this count as cheating? Should I start over now? I definitely felt the dopamine surge. However, I didn't orgasm and so I still have my energy.

No doubt it's a fine line and I don't plan to do this often. Although I think it would be good to check in from time to time to see how I feel about porn images. Has anyone had a similar experience that could advise?

By the way, I noticed that after a while of watching the porn clips I wasn't as aroused. I started to just watch and paid attention to how I felt about it, my thoughts, etc.

Was the cowardly lion just masturbating too much? Quite possibly, however if you remember the story has a happy ending (no pun intended). The cowardly lion finds out who is behind the curtains, the Wizard of Oz. Soon he gets his heart of courage and realizes that the Wizard wasn't so scary as he thought.

I look at this story as a metaphor to porn addiction. The people who run these porn sites are like the Wizard. Behind the scenes they are greedy people trying to manipulate men into feeling insecure. By posting porn videos of sex crazed men lusting for beautiful women along with the mistreatment of them, they send us a message that this is the way we treat women. And as we continue to watch, we start to fall for this and believe that this is how women want to be treated. And in the end, we turn into just another lab rat pulling levers for pleasure.

But if you realize that these porn sites were designed to prey on men's weaknesses, suddenly you have the power and choice. Suddenly you feel more confident knowing that this is not the right path. So let us all get our badge of courage and free ourselves from this nonsense.

I do not think testing with

I do not think testing with porn is a good idea. I look at it as the addicted mind getting hits way. If you keep "testing" with it. You will go further and further till you are "happily" masturbating to orgasm after long periods of looking at porn. As you can see by your own accounts you looked briefly the first time. Then the next time was longer and some masturbation. That will just increase if you keep testing. I think the only way is just to stop all of it.

It is hard to say if you should count it as a relapse. Maybe a learning experience. Which relapses can be that also. I would say a third look would really count as a relapse especially if you end up masturbating to those images. Relapses are going to happen it seems. You just need to find a way to learn from them. I am still learning how to do this. It is an on going thing.

I have been porn free. for 53 days today. I am still having trouble with the masturbation and dopamine surges side of things though.

I would suggest doing your best to go without looking at porn of any kind.

You are doing good. You sound good.

wishing you well
Be Safe

Gotta go with James R.

on this one. I use images of atheletic and fit women, not necessarily porn but it still the same problem. Not being highfallutin here but will definitely relate that "just looking" ramps me back up in just a few days. I don't drink and I relate this too when I could tell people I would have a few beers and be OK. But after a few nights or a week later, I was good and drunk. Same thing to me. Yep, just leave it alone for a while. That's the program I'm doing now. Good insight though!

Me too

One thing I found after abstaining for a while is that I started to find logical reasons why it would be ok to look at some mild images again, e.g. "to see how I felt" or "to keep me going so as stop myself wanting to look at the bad stuff"... but I found that underneath this was just the craving talking, and the more I 'looked a little' the more I looked a lot. I'd recommend not looking at all until you've gone at least 6 weeks, then if you really need to try the experiment, do it with a lot of awareness about how you react - it sounds like you're aware even now of what effect it's having.

In the end, I could only break my compulsion by completely abstaining from all arousing images, and all sexual fantasies. The good news is that when I had a minor relapse recently (after 3 months of abstinence) and I did look at porn, it wasn't fun and it didn't hook me... it was a one off and I got back on track.

time_for_change

Finding logical reasons

It's my day 37 & I have been going through the same stage.. looking at porn/ masturbating (without orgasm)... I now realized I was on wrong track again.. so 2 days ago I decided to avoid all those thoughts.... I have tried abstinence before, but I had wet dreams :(
Now even after 37 days, I don't have a single wet dream...
The only difference this time was that I kept visiting this community..
Wet dreams mainly depend on our subconscious thoughts/fantasies .
Reading experience of other people on this community really helps to keep myself on right track.

@vm22

Day 7 Is the worst time to even think about this.. week 2 is most hard time to control for most guys.
Don't even think about it till you pass week 3.
Good Luck! :)

Thanks guys

Great advice from all. Yes, looking back, I definitely think there was some craving. I will refrain from any type of porn from here on.

What I find interesting is that I don't think I'm addicted to porn. I'm definitely addicted to masturbation which seems to be a natural gateway to porn. And maybe if I continue this habit I would have built an addiciton. I do have a strong desire to masturbate. All this pent up energy in me. However, if I had to masturbate w/o porn for whatever reason, I think I would be okay with it. Although I am not going to masturbate w/o porn just to test this out. We will have to wait and see.

Yes, masturbation

is normal, which leads logically to the idea that all masturbation aids are therefore normal. That might be true, except for the vulnerability of the brain's reward circuitry, which didn't evolve in circumstances where it was possible to masturbate constantly. Smile

It seems that because the costs of excess aren't immediately noticeable, most everyone has concluded frequent orgasm is harmless. It will be interesting to see what you notice as your experiment continues.

It can be tough to find the right balance, with your brain screaming "yes!" even when you know that frequent masturbation isn't serving you. Good luck.

*smile*

I, too, wonder if humanity is at the crest of a giant wave of misunderstanding about its sexuality....and about to shift rapidly in a more prudent direction (hopefully without swinging into some kind of silly guilt-producing repression that's just as bad).

At least I think that when I'm feeling optimistic. Smile