Is mate selection primarily chance followed by a filtering out of who we find intolerable for one reason or another? Even doing things like activities we like to help find more compatible mates, chance + filtering still seems to be the primary process. After all, we can only meet a very finite number of people. Of course, eventually once has to grow to like the person. Is there some better way? What if I want more optimum compatibility? Can I even define optimum? Is a future mate more optimal or less? There are so many life paths and nothing is really known about any of them. I know one can never predict the outcome because life might throw a curve ball into the mix. Is my confused brain missing something?