Give me some techniques

Submitted by Sobrietyseeker on
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I have found great strength reading many of the articles on the site. I really need someone to guide me and provide a general checklist or guideline to quitting. Many of the articles are in depth and very informative. But I need a very practical and simpel steps laid out for me to start. I have tried to overcome pa by will power. That doesn't work. I am starting a 5 day goal of no masturbation and no porn today. But as I go I need advice. I was able to make it 2 days this week off of just watching the videos posted on the website. I understand how my brain works better now. I just need the techniques to help me control my thoughts.

To whoever put this site together - God Bless You and I love you! This is absolutely the most hope I have had since I begin understanding how damaging this addiction is. I've been addicted since I was 11 or 12.

Hear goes 5 days.

2 days is a good start.

2 days is a good start.

The simplest things to start are to:

- keep busy
- be social
- get k-9 porn blocker on your computer
- blog here
- exercise
- meditate
- spend time in nature
- pet an animal
- clean your diet
- decrease stress in any way you can
- get your life under control
- seek therapy
- find a 12 step group
- find "good productive compulsions" to replace your bad unproductive ones
- overcome perfectionism
- spend time with family
- start some new hobbies
- find healthy guy friends
- find healthy women to hang around
- fill your mind up with good inspirational books to replace that porn void in your head
- spend more time in self-care, cleaning
- form a checklist of all the things you need to get done for the day and check them off as you do them
- overcome laziness and inertia
- get an internet timer that only allows you so much time randomly surfing
- go do things youve never done in your town now that you're not sitting in front of your computer with your pants down :)

Good luck to you. You'll get through this

Courage is knowing what not to fear.
-Plato

Good for you

finding the courage to try again. Smile I've enabled you to start a blog if you like. Keep us posted on your progress, and what you find most challenging...and most helpful.

@JR - Great list! I added it to the wiki. Thanks for making my job easier.

Thank You All

I have saved your suggestions in a file that I have printed out. Lists seem to work well to help me. While the are practical and simpl, it is amazing how many of them I have never tried. That is exactly what I needed.

JRSun76, can you elaborate on "clean your diet" and again....

Thank you all for the suggestions.

jn

Hey man...

There is one technique that you MUST do:

You have to refocus your life into something healthy and positive.

Quitting porn alone is not enough, you need to use that energy and time for better things. Look at it as an opportunity to improve your life, do sports, spend more time with people, etc.

You don't remove porn addiction, you substitute it with healthier activities and habits.

I Failed

On Monday I had a job interview. I was so torqued up before it I had a relapse. I was like this is the only thing I know to do to unwind. Since then it seems that the urges are stronger. I will try again.

That's normal

Stress is a huge trigger for everyone. How did the interview go?

It also makes sense that the urges get stronger afterward. Avoiding a binge can be tough.

Keep us posted on your progress. And congratulations on your progress. Give yourself some credit! Smile

One of the benefits of

One of the benefits of recovery is that you learn how to handle stress better and better as you go on. Addicts are very bad at handling stress. The first step is becoming aware of your stresses and triggers. It takes some time to get this, but you'll get it eventually, just keep trying, its worth it.

Courage is knowing what not to fear.
-Plato

Thanks

Thanks for the encouragement. I got the job. I had been looking for 16 months. I felt a ton of relief after learning I got the job.

Marnia is there any research that tells about how long it takes to beat the withdrawal symptoms. I would also like to consider hypnotism. Can you point me in a direction that would help me learn about hypnotism for this. Thanks.

Wonderful!

I'm really happy for you. That's great news.

There's a hypnosis script developed by experts available here. You can record it in your own voice, or listen to my voice recording: Hypnosis Script and Recording for Becoming Porn-Free
http://www.reuniting.info/node/3554

For more information, you can also contact your fellow site member "HP Hypnotist": http://www.reuniting.info/user/4205

No one is researching the withdrawal from porn directly, because most experts still deny it is an addiction. *rolls eyes* However, what we're learning from actual people's experience with porn recovery is that the first two weeks are the worst.

People remain very sensitive to porn-related cues for a total of about two months. Gradual improvements continue thereafter.

The more one avoids "lighting up" the unwanted brain pathways during recovery (with fantasy, porn, flashbacks), the faster it proceeds. A period of abstinence from PMO can be helpful for some people. However, after the two-month period, you generally have to find a way to reach a balance...or accept that the occasional wet dream is part of life. (Wet dreams can also be quite frequent initially.)

For many people, the stimulation of (dopamine released by) porn (even without orgasm) is greater than the stimulation of masturbation without it...at least until the brain returns to normal sensitivity. So avoiding porn can be more important than avoiding the occasional orgasm. Incidentally, orgasm with a partner tends to be more soothing than orgasm alone, and there is some science backing that up.

Hope this helps.