Giving up porn--cold turkey?

Submitted by Searcher1 on
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I just deleted my account from a sex chat site, and am hoping to be porn-free from now on. It's definitely affecting my life in negative ways. I'm debating about whether to get rid of the porn I have right now all at once. I would like to do so, but am concerned that given a relapse, I'll devote time, energy, and money to getting what I've already gathered. What are your experiences with getting rid of all of it versus more gradually getting rid of it?

Hi searcher1, My experience

Hi searcher1,

My experience has been that as long as I still had anything on my computer, I was taking a break, more than quitting. Perhaps if you do relapse, and devote all that time and energy collecting more, and then delete it again, it will eventually seem silly to you to be wasting so much time - and that will make it easier to quit for good.

An analogy

If you had a friend who was an alcoholic who said they were going to quit cold turkey, but they said that just in case, they are going to keep a flask in their pocket, would you think they're going to succeed?

Quizure

Ditch it

This is from my personal experience.

(In the following points, my girl is in different country - a long distance relationship - 10 hour time difference)
• The first time, when my girl got upset about me watching porn, I quit. I did not delete any of the downloaded videos (20 GB), or get rid of 8 DVDs containing my most favorite porn. I was happy to quit for her, but what to do when I want to m'bate. After stopping to watch porn, my sensitivity started to go up. Simple lesbian kissing on the youtue, or a Brazilian lingerie shows, a site selling microbikini, or even exercising girls in skimpy clothes were sufficing my needs of visual stimuli.
• Not sure, but then my girl gave me permission to watch. I was ecstatic, and back to watching regularly.
• After some time, when my girl was in mood and we cud have phone sex, I was not in mood, because I wanted visual, and not just one or two, but many girls. So she asked me to stop. This time, I found it really bothering me. Really. I used to get very irritated. The earlier youtube vids did not work.
• Then she came over to US. I had some problems performing sexually. Erection weren't staying there, stimulation was not enough. So, I made up my mind. Deleted all the downloaded porn in front of her, and stopped watching porn completely. In fact, since she came, I had stopped. But my performance did not completely go up, the way I wanted.
• Then I learned more and more about the effect of porn, and after she left (over one month), I decided to be completely porn free to the heart. Literally shredded 8 of my favorite dvds, in paper shredder (I have the one that can shred dvds).

Since then, I haven't watched porn, or sought out youtube videos (as I mentioned before) or any other types of erotica. In between, I used to go out and see some sexy dresses for my girl and even would show her. This used to be at least some stimulation, but I have even stopped that. Why? Because I want to develop my other senses, I want to fantasize only about my girl, and reach orgasm. In fact, I haven't m'bated since 17-Dec-2010.

So, after 17 years of porn, and how I have been able to stop watching, I think it is possible to stop. We need a reason big enough, and we need to accept this as a challenge. I feel that you should start accepting small challenges, if you'd like to get into habit of being someone who likes the challenge. Because then you will develop the willpower to resist porn.

Just FYI, I met my girl after 5 years, and in that time, I haven't dated or fantasized or even feelings-wise thought about any other girl.

When you keep something, you believe in the possibility of going back. When you're really committed to quit, why keep such a possibility? Self-sabotage?

Take up running or something else that gives you dopamine rush.

Keep posting..
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2 Months Sober from porn and enjoying every minute of that.
No M'bation since 17-Dec-2010 - First time in 16 years!

.

quitting addiction is the hardest thing you might have to do in your life. I'd say the only way is to "man up" and punch it in the face. It's like taking in a disgusting medicine; or like doing that last set of bench press; or running that last 5 minutes without dropping in speed; or not driking water when you are really thirsty because you don't have much water left. It's hard, but there is no other way.

delete it all and go "gold" turkey.

cold to gold! wow!

[quote=noobzealot]
delete it all and go "gold" turkey.[/quote]

***** Five Stars for making cold to gold! What a transformation! Gold Turkey is a good turkey! :D
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2 Months Sober from porn and enjoying every minute of that.
No M'bation since 17-Dec-2010 - First time in 16 years!

This is truly inspirational.

[quote=noobzealot]quitting addiction is the hardest thing you might have to do in your life. I'd say the only way is to "man up" and punch it in the face. It's like taking in a disgusting medicine; or like doing that last set of bench press; or running that last 5 minutes without dropping in speed; or not driking water when you are really thirsty because you don't have much water left. It's hard, but there is no other way.

delete it all and go "gold" turkey.[/quote]

This is truly inspirational.

Thanks all

I trashed nearly all of it with a few mouse clicks. Will round up the remaining DVDs and mags and dispose of them as soon as I can do so discreetly. Have not looked at it in about two days (the longest I've been porn-free as of late is a little over two weeks, so hopefully I'll sustain it).

Sounds like

you're making good progress. Remember, if you have to choose between masturbation and porn/fantasy, try just sticking to masturbation. Although it can trigger a binge, it doesn't blast your brain with empty dopamine the way porn material does.

This strategy sometimes makes it easier to stay on an even keel.