After going 48 days without pornography, I slipped and went back to the porn. My previous record was 45 days, so I have surpassed that. I am, however, still quite upset at having slipped. I know what has lead me here, though:
-Smoking. I bought a pack about a week ago and started again. This has thrown me off. I noticed since I started again that my sexual drive went way up (well, sexual drive for porn). It throws me off course trying to live a healthy lifestyle.
-Imbalance in emotions. The last few weeks I have had ups and downs, and lately especially. Could be due to the smoking as well. I have been unsure of how to deal with it, and so resorted to cigarettes. Replacing one addiction with another.
-To take my current pack of cigarettes, rip them in half and throw them away. I can't have them
in my life if I want to succeed with ousting porn. I think the nicotine has fiddled with my dopamine and reward systems and caused me to become imbalanced and to crave. Though I am no neuroscientist, mere speculation.
I heard on the radio someone talking about how just one element to a healthy lifestyle, if neglected, can throw off the whole course. That does truly seem to be the case.
I must try to look up. I need some encouragement now. Too bad I slipped, but I did go a lengthy time. Also must resist relapse.
Thanks for reading,