Today marks the longest I've gone without PMO since I began viewing porn and masturbating as a child, so I figured I would start a log. It has actually been 3 weeks or so without porn. My original intent was to give up porn alone since that seemed to be the main culprit. But, I realized that it was too difficult to masturbate without visualizing fetish porn scenes, so I came to terms with what had to be done.
I have had sex with two girls since beginning this period of abstinence, but I did not orgasm. I rarely have ED problems, but the frequent inability to orgasm during sex is one of the symptoms that brought me here. The other issue is shame brought on by the fetish porn that I advanced to (transexual) and a fear of advancing further. I've also never had morning wood. I never put much thought into this, but apparently this is another side effect of too much PMO.
So far, my main withdrawal symptom has been HOCD. Lately, it has been difficult for me to go out in public without questioning and testing myself over and over. I had severe HOCD when younger, but nearly completely recovered years ago. This has been the first time in 8-10 years that HOCD is starting to affect my life again. Fortunately, this sufferer posted his story which gives me hope since it sounds so similar:
So, I'll keep this updated every few days. I would like to make it 6-8 weeks. I still haven't committed myself to giving up sex during this period of PMO abstinence since I have no desire to become celibate in the future. I really just want to grow accustomed to feeling arousal and reaching orgasm from sex. I'll have to make a judgement over the next few weeks to find out if this needs to be eliminated, as well.
Thanks for your support.