premature ejaculation

Submitted by Superdry on
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Hi Guys,

Am new to the site and this is my first post.
Just finish reading CPA and bells started ringing form page 1, i have now given it to my wife to read. we have be married for 10 year were both 35 yeras old and have found that our marriage is fall apart although we both love each other dearly we have lost the magic and caring attitude toward each other, well it does come around once every 2 weeks and then feel like shit for another 2. I have in the past you'd porn started at avery young age 6 years old (found granpa's porn stash) to matubate 2-3 time a week but realised it was making me lerthargic so i haven't been doing it for the past month or so. but sex has the same effect larthegy, loss of enegry, motivation, patience, very suseptable to other female, get me angery and a whole lot more.

So we both decided to inquire into karezza but everytime we try i pop of within like the first minute of slow intercourse. we have not done the exchanges but we try Karezza 3 time this weekend with the same result every time. any pointers would be much apriceated.

What I would try...

While I am here for a different reason as yourself, I can tell you what I would do in your spot. It won't be out of experience, just some thoughts on where to go next.

I would try from the beginning again. Stay off of the PIV sex and just focus on exploring each others bodies. Give each other massages and make the focus on feeling everything throughout your entire body. Talk to each other in loving ways, comment on her scent, on how smooth her skin is. All the things that you really love about her and have her do the same things for you. Laugh together, share the energy together. Those behaviors will hopefully strengthen your bond to each other.

After doing that for a few weeks, introducing PIV sex again could be a next step. Strictly karezza style. The premature ejaculation problem is however, totally on you. You need to learn to control yourself and your level of arousal. If you have to stop to cool down then stop. If you aren't using a condom, perhaps put on one as it will help to reduce stimulation. The urge to get to the finish line when you are that hot is very strong, believe me I am fully aware. But you have to learn to recognize when you are getting too hot and use methods that will cool you down. Many guys in the porn camps swear by icing their genitals as a way to control unwanted arousal, perhaps having one of those gel ice packs beside the bed as a sort of 'fire extinguisher' might help as a last resort method of cooling down. It really will boil down to you consciously observing yourself and taking the right actions when you get too hot. The good news is that the more you practice control, the easier it will get in the future.

I hope this helps,

W.

"Imagination is more important than knowledge" ~ Einstein

"We cannot become what we need to be by remaining what we are." ~ Max Depree

Be the kind of person that when you wake up in the morning the devils says, "Oh Crap, It's up!"

The Exchanges

would probably help with this. Feel free to create your own, although the little "pep talks" before each one are useful.

Give your body a chance to reset itself. Also, not sure how vigorously you're making love, but you may want to slow it down. Did you read the descriptions on this thread? http://www.reuniting.info/node/6109

Let us know how you get on.