Literature, such as that by Eckhart Tolle, suggests that we can change our reaction by focusing on ourselves and moderating our present response. If a situation makes one emotional, we can change our reaction and that will change our response to the situation. How can we know when our response is the correct response for us and indicates that we should instead change the situation? There must be some situations that are meant to be changed. How do we identify that tipping point between the need for inner and outer change so as to make clearer decisions? Do we make the internal changes first? How can we be sure we’ve made enough inner change and are not falling into our own delusion? Are there any books on this nuance of this sort of topic?