Submitted by MJ Consciousness on
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Hi

I just created an account, after this happened to me.
Im 23 and I came across this information 7 months ago. I was very deprressed the way things were, I was angry for apparently no reason, I knew that positive thinking is the key and all that , but it was simply impossible to think positively. And in general EVERYTHING sucked.
I one day had this thought about some girls having some aura and some dont, and this might be sexual energy so I searched for it, and everything I read made sense.
I tried it for a week, and what I recognized was this inner calmness and everything, but also it was a little bit like Extacy, MDMA. I also "looked" a little bit like I was on mdma. But I mean the good way. I experimtened for a few month with mdma, toook it probably 10 times, not too large doses. And one day I would take it for a party, and Iw as a litlte bit sleepy and had not much energy (and at that time I was masturbating like most of us) but I'd take the mdma, I was motivated, and in the mirror, there was this little bit red "glow" in the face, and the eyes were open wide. And of course the empathy, the feeling one, and bliss.And it was similar when I first stopped for a week.
Since then I never made it longer than 12 or so days, this twice, and in between always failing after few days, then starting again and so on, but overall theres a steady energy increase and all of it, but of course one has to make it through 1-2 months first.
now after 7 months experimenting, also if I fail once, I get back to the energy level where its fun gain, relatively soon, lets say 3-4 days. And when I had this thought it could be like mdma, I came across this site http://biologyofkundalini.com/article.php?story=Bliss
which just confirmed my thought. ANd by thae way EVERYHTING I read here on this site, I noticed in some way just after 7 day.s The fact that there was a bigger connection to EVERYTHING to nature and EVERYONE around us if we abstain, and not only that, I think, that it makes more and more parts of the brain conscious. what I mean is, they say 10 percent is conscious, and 90 percent unconscious, yet it controlls our lives. WHat we are doing (I believe) is pulling out the unconscious into the conscious, and "miracles" are then possible. Its like being a child again, seeing the world with this glow, as Ive seen it as a child.
And on that site it says, that when we abstain chemicals are released over time, and that it could eventually become a "bliss trip" and comparable to mdma, lsd and heroin together, but all "made by our body"
And why I am saying this is, because I just had a sort of "optical" illusion. I smoked some light weed, but I have to say, I smoke a lot for 5 years, and this weed Im smoking is not that strong, and Ive been smoking it now the couple of days and also all day today, and it is definitely NOT capable of getting me this high.
What Ive experienced e was, like if Ive smoked weed the first time in my life, or this is how I could imagine LSD (never took it before). I was in the bathrooim, looking at my hand and it seemed as of not part of me. This kind of feeling I had in the very beginning when I smoked the first time. As if my spirit was observing. Then I went into my room, layed down, and suddenly my heart startewd to beat really fast (also like weed when it "comes up") and literally I had some optics then, and I thought for a second, that there were some other drugs in the weed (impossible because I know where it comes from), I was laying then on the bed, and for 1-2 seconds eveerything was VERY bright in the room, I mean the light (an effect mdma had on me when it kicks in), something weed doesnt make to me and Im experienced. after that this heartbeating and everyehitng went back to normal, and I dindt feel like I was leaving my body anymore. I LITERAYLL felt like I was leaving my body and I couldnt do anything about it (feeling you have on stronger psychedelics) and then, I had a feeling in my prostate, so I relate it to my abstinence.
Also referring to the light, Ojas which is created from sperm they say, is light. And this also connects so much into light. If your in the sun, sperm production goes up, thus ojas I would suggest.

I am very sensitive to drugs , and have all the positive and negative effects very intensively. So also when I masturbate the negative effects are very intense, but so are the postive if I stop, and I wonder if anyone else had this feeling as if he was "trippinng" or going to trip.
I mean I was literayll afraid I was going for a trip alone in the middle of the night (but as I said, I knew it makes no sence because where would anything come from i was just smoking some light weed im smoking for days and am an experienced smoker)

Also I noticed in the last weeks, that if Im lets say on day 4-5 and I get aroused by thought or whatever, and then let the arousal go, 5-10 minutes later an Extacy like high kicks in! its really amazing, how you can party wihtout taking anything and be higher than all the other people and have so much energy.

But back to the question, has anyone else got these MDMA like highs (without the shitty depression afterwards), or these LSD or super strong weed like states of consciousness?

I had this short 2-3 minute TRIP and Im on day 4 now, and am really wondering "what" Im going to see if Ill go for the entire month and then two and more!

Having experienced drugs

Having experienced drugs when I was younger, I feel that the practice of natural cultivation is way more interesting and safe. There is a possibility of losing your mind on this journey for some period of time while doing it naturally, its almost a guarantee that you will if you use drugs. Plus, everything you need is in your brain, you just have to work for it. If drugs were the best route for self-realization, then older hippies would be enlightened by now... but go check out a place with a heavy older generation of drug users... not quite enlightened.

I have had many periods of time where I feel like Im on something. No visual dragons or anything like that, but who needs all of those entertaining states/visuals when you are living out your life and your fantasies are not only grounded in reality, but are coming true! This stuff is powerful, be safe with your mind with it... slow and grounded approach, all of that knowledge and wisdom can be gain with just paying attention, these things can be sustained with meditation and virtuous living.

Im glad I experimented with mind-altering substances when I was young, I just wish I had someone to tell me to temper it in grounded and responsible action and intentions.

If one way be better than another, that you may be sure is nature's way.
-Aristotle

Thanks for the Reply but

Thanks for the Reply but please, I dont want any moral preaches about how drug us is bad I KNOW, and I maybe didnt mention it, but I dont take ANYTHING by now only weed which is no drug, not even a drop of alc, so please I KNOW all of this stuff, and how olsd drugged hippies arent enlightneded, thank you.

But as I said, I HAD have experience with drugs, i relate my experiences with abstaining from orgasm to some of those with drugs, thats all, and I wonder if anyone else noticed these effects too.

The mood swings

that accompany a reboot are different for everyone, but they reflect powerful fluctuations in the brain. I'm not surprised at the effects you report. I have heard others say similar things, although not in such detail.

Start a blog if you want to track your progress.

Interesting!

MJ... thanks for sharing. I have no direct experience of this, and no knowledge of brain changes/effects or anything. However, I've heard that the experience of higher levels of consciousness is similar to the experience of MDMA. People believe that drugs "induce" a high - however, I've heard that what drugs actually do is "block off" the negativity of lower emotions of the ego, thus allowing us to experience our true nature temporarily, which is bliss. So, alcohol doesn't 'make' us joyful, it's that the lower emotions are temporarily blocked off, and we experience more of the joyfulness that is our true nature. It's in our potential to live every day like we're on an MDMA trip, by transcending the negativity of our ego. The drug doesn't "cause" the high, the high is us (people believe the drug causes the high, and get addicted).

It's nice to hear your experiences, and it makes sense that it is happening whilst abstaining. Exciting! I'm looking forward to hearing how things go. (Thanks for sharing the link, I'll read soon).

Thanks for the answers. yes

Thanks for the answers.
yes its very interesting. But .... today on day 6 I had a wet dream. As I said, in the 7 months im trying to go for at least a month, I twice made it to 12-13 days, and was then interrupted by myself. Now, Ive reached a point, where I can say I wont do it to me anymore, so Im not MO-ing, but now, as if something wouldnt "let me" now Im starting to get wet dreams.
So maybe, this "transition" is so rapid, that my body is saying: " ok we need to slow wa little bit downe " could this be? that over time they will go away?On some pages I read, that its not really draining the energy, and also on many spritual sites it said, wet dreams dont drain you as mcuh as voluntary orgasm. But yet also here on this site I read people saying, they felt it. I also felt it somehow, but I could manage it, not to give in today and go on with MO-ing as a result of this. so Im still counting days,

So maybe, because its so intense (also because of that trip like feeling) maybe its just regulating itself?

What's important is

how a wet dream does, or doesn't, affect *you.* What you read about them is irrelevant. Smile

Just trust your body and don't try to control wet dreams. No one can do that. Everyone returns to balance differently.

How are you otherwise?

yeah, its really irrelevant,

yeah, its really irrelevant, I was jsut curious, and wanted to know what others say about it.
Of course I dont want to regulate it, and everything is fine, it would be just better if it didnt came out at night you know:) . Its pretty hard on some days, and sometimes I feeel depressed, but not really depressed, its more a sad feeling, Im feeling alone althought Im not really alone I have friends and all that, but yeah, with the days I get more and more emotional. But thats a good sign. That is what I want to get back. Be able to feel again, fall in love, like back then... You know what I think is funny? when I was a child, I here and there was in love with some girl, at school or whatever. and I was really like dreaming about being with her, just being with her together. And grown ups in those days would say: "children cant be inlove, they dont know what its is, what it means"
how Ironic, esepcially in these times, it seems like grown ups wouldnt be able to fallk in love because of the overstimulation and all that.
Now, the more I stay away from orgasm, these feeling come back, wwhich I had as a child, but this time also more powerful in some way. Like I have more power.

I'm sorry you're having rough days,

but your post is beautiful. You're exactly right, we have to return to childlike dopamine sensitivity, and learn to blend it with our sexy urges and our adult power in our relationships if we want to experience love again. Adults today have a lot to learn. I certainly did. Wink

Anyway, it's great that you're feeling those feelings again on the good days.