1/3 into reboot. Stuffed it. [1]

Ok. I need some help. I avoided PMO for a full month in December. Almost all of January and I've stuffed it repeatedly. About every 10 days or so since then. The desire builds up and I blow it. How does this habit just so easily wipe out reason and completely obliterate self control?!

I'm stunned. Fair enough dopamine's going crazy but I don't even want the thrill anymore. I hate using porn and it's really hard to wipe out the gay desire, I get sucked into that crap because I don't like seeing girls used in porno's. Stupid really. I just want to think straight and move on in life. It's like a subconscious call back to what I really don't want.

How does everyone work themselves out and get over it? Surely you're thinking differently about porn? Can someone explain their attitude to it?
Like once the desire kicks in, what do you say to yourself?

I'm no expert in this but is there something else that can be done to get a high (without drugs) and stop using porn?