My partner and I have been practising this new approach to love making for over a year now. There are the occasional slips which set off scary mood swings and and a desire in me to bolt. My partner becomes more taciturn and more addictive in his behaviour.
What I notice in particular is how much less impulsive I am in my behaviour over all, and more rational and realistic. For instance, during the sales season, I used to always find myself buying an expensive coat or evening dress I could not really afford, fantasising that by wearing it I was going to impress people who would be interviewing me or meeting me.So often the job or situation didn't materialise and I'd be left with an overdraft and several items of pretty but useless clothes in my wardrobe.I also used to feel stuck in my job because I could not afford to leave it.
At the winter sales last year, I was still attracted to the suede and fur trimmed coats and despite the seeming bargain reduction, I was able to try one on, fantasise for a few moments, then take it off without feeling the need to actually buy it.It felt great not to be in the grip of this compulsion for indulgence.
More recently, I have also started attending a slimming club and have found losing weight and sticking to the regime easier than in the past.I put it down to feeling more stable in my relationship. I think the increased oxytocin has been reducing my cravings and impulsivity.My sweetheart has been taking this on board too, he has cut back on his drinking and doesn't let himself get swept along by others so much. As he could benefit from losing a few pounds too, we've been exercising together which makes it more fun and less of a chore.
I have also taken up playing the piano which is a real challenge to me.My pattern in the past has been to be enthusiastic then to move on when it starts to get tough or boring or requiring steady application. As I have never felt as stable in my life before, I am hoping that this will be another area where I'll see progress.
Thank you for making the links and helping us to see how the change in energy flow can make such subtle but real changes in our quality of life and decision making. I know too that if I fall off the wagon that it is possible to wait out the mayhem and start again.